Archive for February, 2008
You know you haven’t been to the gym in awhile when…
The staff greets you with surprise as soon as you enter. “Hi! Where have you been!” “Oh my god! We missed you!” “You’re…coming to the gym?” “What, are you here to use the hair dryers and leave again?” “No, we don’t want any priceless velvet paintin–ohhhh, hi! You! Um. The gym is thaaaat way and [...]
Read More..>>Y u txt me bzotch?
At exactly 2:32 a.m. this morning, I was awakened from a drug-induced sleep (mmmm…muscle relaxants…mmmm) by a rather loud chime that I couldn’t quite place. Once I was fully cognizant, I realized that it was my cell phone, hidden over in the corner, gaining strength from its charger. Apparently, even though I’d had it on [...]
Read More..>>I’m the Greatest STAR!
See, I’m basically an attention whore. I will do anything at any time just to get attention. I try hard for the positive kind, but I’m not picky; any attention will do. Which must be why I agreed to do a commercial today. The specifics on how I was offered the role of House Beautiful [...]
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